holding-handsI love Christmas lights. I want to have the National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation house. Yes, I am that girl. So today, I reminded my husband that it’s now the weekend, and since he was “busy” last weekend, now would be a perfect time to put up Christmas lights.

Me: You should go outside and do the Christmas lights. They are still up from last year so you should just need to plug them in.

Him: It’s a lot more involved in that. And I’m going to just skip the lights this year.

Me: WHAT?!

(5 minutes pass)

He receives a text on his phone.

Him: Hey Bailey (our son), do you want to climb up the ladder and put up Christmas lights?

Bailey: No.

Me: Do it or you’re grounded.

My husband gets up from the couch, takes our son with him, and heads outside for what I believe to be putting up Christmas lights.

(4 hours pass)

I go outside to get the mail. It’s now dark. And my path to the mailbox is not illuminated by twinkling Christmas lights. What the heck. Husband, and son, nowhere in sight. But I see his truck two doors down at our friend’s house. What the heck x 2.

(30 minutes pass)

He walks in the door.

Me: Where the heck have you been for the past 4 hours?

Him: Oh I forgot I promised John I would work on his mother-in-law’s car today.

Me: Last weekend, you said it would be a 15 minute job.

Him: Yeah I also helped them get a Christmas tree.

Me: I have no lights outside. The neighbor put up their lights today. His lights are illuminating the entire street. We are in darkness. He even has an animated rocking horse thingy in his front yard.

Him: A rocking horse thingy?

Me: Yes. And you need to put up our blow-up penguin.

Him: It got holes in it last year, remember?

Me: Use duct tape.

Him: I don’t have any duct tape.

Me: You have a beard. And you’re a man. What kind of bearded man doesn’t have duct tape?

Him: I’ll put up the lights tomorrow.

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About The Author


Hi there! I'm Jenny, a coffee-addicted, busy-body, work at home mom of two insane boys. I love football, cooking, Deadliest Catch, video games, Wordpress, and CSS (I'm kindof a geek). Feel free to say hi! We can be nerdy together.

13 Responses to Life with a Bearded Man: Christmas Lights

  1. iluvroxie4ever says:

    Christmas is the best time and holiday of the year with friends and family.

  2. Kathy Idol says:

    This sounds like my house. Got to love it

  3. drcole says:

    In response to your “about me” piece Jenny, I can surely relate. I am now 56 and a retired doctor of nursing, but I will never forget raising my kids, while going to college/university, and then having to pay for all of those student loans. I was a high-school drop-out, married at 16 (not pregnant), so accomplished much career-wise; however, I did not spend enough time with my kids! I would have taken a different route, as you have, had the internet been available during those years. My daughter, Nichole, is a stay at home mom and makes almost as much money on the net via sweeps, etc. than she would using her BA. Good for you.

  4. InezbyDesign says:

    Ha!  Love the story…..real life??  We also have no lights this year, but then we won’t be home.  I love lights and would have them up from Oct 1 to Mar 30.

  5. That is a riot! My husband kept moving the boxes around from room to room…and finally on Thursday he said “I think we are skipping them this year” and put them back in the attic. No lights here this year :(

  6. brettbmartin says:

    Lol. No lights no football!

  7. AshleyStafford says:

    Awwww =( I’m sorry!

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